There is hope

Tons of thoughts and ideas floated in my head. The search for endless love and respect continued, as I felt a strange fear in my chest, but could not reveal the reason for it. Intensity perpetually elevated upon my mind. Intrigued by the blank correspondence in my internals, I made an effort to clean up the accumulated dust from my past. I looked in the mirror. Externally everything looked like I was at peace, although something condemned my invisible contamination.

Avoidance was the easiest path that I knew of, but somehow prevented myself from going there again. Without any hesitation, I decided that chasing the truth would lead me to the solution of my problem. In all cases, emotional detachment was inevitable. Only then, my anxiety would disappear, at least for a moment. Coping with the present and solving the past, I now saw everything as one whole. The issue was already known to me, but was hidden in the depths of my inner personality.

I needed courage to reach the solitary place, full of chaos, and yet, so precious. Understanding it truly was not possible, whereas a rebellious internal protest was born. Diffused rays of consciousness appeared and I felt them, but did not capture them with sight. Almost seemed like a good option, like a new unfolded universe, filled with knowingness. I spared a moment to shake my head and senses, then asked myself why, why is there no mercy? Before it all fell apart, I was ready to stand on the edge. Now, different sorts of fears kept me away from achieving “my glory”.

A maintainer of unrealistic ideas, a “utopia” that was possible, but unimaginable because of the current ignorance we have engraved. The comfort that this system offered me, was strictly material, disconnected from spiritual knowledge, although spiritual does not refer to religious knowledge. It locked away our creativity and we became divided. Weighting on two sides, the temptation for the material was promised and defined. The mystery of the spiritual had no facts, and with that, it was listed as dangerous for our ECONOMY. We all hold the key to access it, unfortunately countless chores steal our attention away from breaking the cage.

Far beyond the darkness, illuminates a matter of light, which is not manifested. That light is the hope that motivates us to survive and crave for the ultimate shelter. There is no denying the fact, that such ultimate stage could only be achieved with endless, honest effort. No one can take away the gratitude we feel inside for being alive. It can turn denial into affirmation, chaos into order. It can even turn your enemy into your friend.

Appreciation for all living entities should be a priority. Being led by these instructions and steps, we will develop the true science of knowledge. Isn’t it sad how we know all these scientifically proven facts and information, about almost everything surrounding us, but cannot find the cause of the emptiness we feel inside. We have even went materially so deep, reaching the very creation of everything, the atom, still feelings and emotions trouble us to this very moment.

And we attempt to hide them, deny everything that makes us human. Embracing all this will take time, especially for the person who has denied emotions throughout life. In other words, self-knowledge is nothing but victory. That is the only war we need to declare. And it will be the hardest war to triumph. “The harder the conflict, the more glorious the triumph. What we obtain too cheap, we esteem too lightly. It is dearness only that gives everything its value. I love the man that can smile in trouble, that can gather strength from distress and grow” – Thomas Paine.